The former Gladiator has given himself some daft nicknames, crashed a van full of dead badgers and proposed to the busty model. Not bad...

This is real life

He calls himself the Devil Dawg, he hashtags his own tweets #KingDavid and more recently he crashed a van full of DEAD BADGERS. As you do.
The mystery man is, of course, Kelly Brook's charming new fiancé David McIntosh .
The loved-up couple dated for just 11 WEEKS - which also included a brief separation but let's not talk about that - before McIntosh eventually proposed.
If you're not currently familiar with the former Gladiator, we've collated some of his best tweets so you can get to know him better.
A quick heads up, he also retweeted something about the Illuminati being in control of the media so this list might just very well blow Tornado Devil Dawg King David's tiny mind.

Seven of his most illuminating Twitter remarks

We're not sure being engaged is meant to make someone "smash" anything "dat wud cripple" anyone. But what do we know?

biggest smile on my face 1:cos I av da most incredible woman in my life 2:cos I'm smashing a shoulder session dat wud cripple 10 humans
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) March 25, 2014

If you ignore the fact he's called himself the "shredded overlord", and we know it's hard, then just imagine for a second that someone in their right mind would think da papers would waste their time airbrushing his body. Which incidentally looks like a child's drawing of Stretch Armstrong.

Why do da papers insist on photo shopping out my abbs!! Try ur best to bring down a shredded overlord and u'll miserably fail #teamlean
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) March 22, 2014

Imagine how dull a regular "stir" must be in David's life, if an early Christmas lunch gets things kicking off. Kelly might like to note that he might not fully understand the sanctity of marriage if he fancies himself as the perfect househusband for, er, himself.

Causing an absolute stir in the kitchen this evening making an early Xmas lunch wish I could marry myself. Hmmm is that possible?
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) December 19, 2013

Presented without comment.

Hmmmmm quite impressed with television today to say the least all I need now is a slave I mean friend to fetch me icecream
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) December 27, 2013

Oh, well he seems quite obsessed with the pre-historic idea of having a slave. So it's fair to say he can barely look after himself and has no social compass. Marvellous.

I'm so hungry but the shops are so far why can't I have a slave
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) March 8, 2014

We don't know what a "naughty cocktail" is but we imagine it involves those novelty plastic willy straws you see a bride-to-be slurping on at her hen party in Brighton.

Looking forward to tomoz some naughty cocktails at the milton club manchester #luxury
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) December 6, 2013

He's THAT guy you see in the chilly month of March wearing something that would probably offend you in the blissful month of June. But it's coming from the man who wore THESE shorts, so really nothing surprises us :(.

Warning order warning order London inbound weather is banging shorts n vest it is, straight up frontin
— David Mcintosh (@devildawg85) March 9, 2014

Blimey.

Meanwhile, the model arrived solo at John F. Kennedy International Airport in New York after announcing her engagement to Gladiator David McIntosh last night.
We can't see a ring yet but we can only hope it's because the hunky man is waiting to find her the perfect sparkler.
Wearing a black mac coat and a red shirt poking out from underneath, Kel was glowing as she smiled to cameras.
She might be wearing minimal makeup for the flight, but the star still looks flawless.
The pair chose Instagram to share their happy news - because that's where everything happens in the world of celebrity.

 

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